Turning Memories into Manuscripts: How to Write a Book About Your Life

Introduction: The Importance of Turning Life Experiences into a Book

Congratulations! You are taking the first step towards writing your life story.

For some people, stringing words into sentences is frightening. If you feel the same way, you are not alone—if writing was easy, everyone would do it!

But, let’s face it, writing is hard, especially if you are writing about your life. But you do not have to do it alone. This guide, along with the DIYBook writing platform, provides all the tools and techniques you need to write your life story and write it well.

If your last major piece of writing was an essay for high school English, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. The DIYBook writing and printing platform was created for you.

If you love writing but never seem to find the time to do it, our platform and this guide will help you make the most out of your time and will result in the book you want to write.

Writing your life story ensures that your descendants know their heritage and the stories that make your family special.

Think about someone in your family who you wish you knew more about—maybe your grandmother who started the family laundry business or a cousin who traveled the globe. Maybe you know the bare minimum—name, place of birth, one or two facts—but you wish you knew more. More about what drove them to follow their dreams, to find the drive to overcome obstacles, and how their experiences shaped who they became. Writing your life story is a gift to those you may never know.

As you write your life story, you may face the prospect of dealing with discomfort—difficult moments in your life, moments you wish turned out differently, moments that left you with emotional (or physical) scars. There may be no getting around the hard parts, but the very act of writing these stories can be a healing experience and allow those old wounds to finally heal.

Finally, writing your life story is a great way to get better at writing and to have fun by reminiscing about your life. 

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Identify Your Why

Determining Your Goals

You want to write your life story. Great! Now, you need to identify why you’re writing your life story. A few reasons why you might want to embark on this adventure include:

• Leaving a legacy for future generations
• Sharing your story with the world
• Gaining a deeper sense of self-awareness
• Developing better writing skills

You may also want to write your life story to help you appreciate the way your life turned out and memorialize what you have accomplished. As an exercise in self-discovery, life story writing can also help you discover your strengths and weaknesses and offer you insight into what motivates you. Throughout this process, you may write about difficult moments, and by doing so, you may find the strength to forgive yourself or others for past mistakes and move forward with your life.

To help you determine your why, try answering the following questions

• What do I hope others will learn from reading my life story?
• What do I hope I will learn from writing my life story?

As you write, keep reminding yourself of why you’re doing this. Your why should be a powerful incentive to help you keep going.

Can you write write about your life without finding your why? Of course, but writing with purpose almost always leads to a better, fuller, more exciting book. Finding your why ensures that you have a goal beyond just jotting down names, dates, and events.

Reasons People Write Autobiographies (Life Stories)

Writing for any reason is a way for humans to explore and share ideas. We write things down to ensure we remember our thoughts, whether as mundane as a grocery list or as important as a college admissions essay.

• Writing provides a fresh perspective. We can share our point of view with others and hope readers learn something new or recognize that there are always two sides to every story.

• Writing is a personal act, especially when you’re writing about your life. You are sharing your thoughts, hopes, dreams, wishes, and beliefs on paper. You are making a declaration, stating a fact, sharing an opinion, exposing a truth, and hoping a reader will find something valuable in your words.

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Finding Your Unique Angle

How to Identify Unique Aspects of Your Life Story

Each of us has a unique personal story. Sure, there may be similarities, but ultimately, no one else will have the exact same life story as you. That said, how do you identify the unique aspects of your life and craft a book around them? It’s not as hard as you might think—here’s how to find your angle:

• Think about why you wanted to write your life story in the first place. (See “What’s Your Why?” for more details on this.) If you know why you’re writing, you may already know what makes your story unique. For example, if you want to write your life story because you overcame a hardship, you know that what you did and how you did it are meaningful components of your book.
• If you’re still having trouble identifying the unique aspects of your life story, try completing the following exercise:
  • List the ways that you are special.
  • List the things you have done that helped shape who you are.
  • List the events that have happened to you that helped shape who you are.

This list should help you see the ways that you and your story are one of a kind. If you need even more specifics, the library of DIYBook writing prompts can help you get greater clarity on who you are.

Remember that there are no right or wrong answers to this exercise, and it doesn’t matter if you come up with 10 or 100 items. The goal is to get you thinking about your life and the special moments that you want to write about in your book.

Pattern and Structure

Outlining vs. Freewriting: The Pros and Cons

You’re ready to start writing your life story—or are you? Do you think you need to outline your book first? Or maybe you would prefer to just start digging in and drafting chapters but are afraid that’s the “wrong way” to write a book. Is there a right or wrong way to approach your book? Let’s get into it.

Structure is essential to any good piece of writing. That structure can be as basic as having a beginning, a middle, and an end, or it can be as complicated as a detailed chapter-by-chapter outline.

Benefits of Outlining

• Highlights where your story starts, how it ends, and what you hope readers will learn.
  Clarifies your goals and ensure you focus on the parts of your life story that are important to you.
• Empowers you with the knowledge that you know what you’re writing about.
• Motivates you to keep writing.

Drawbacks of Outlining

• Time consuming. Some writers would rather just get right to it and start writing. But sometimes outlining in advance can save you time later on.
• Stifles creativity. Some writers feel that an outline will keep them from experiencing creative sparks.

Research and Resources

Gathering Photos, Letters, and Diaries to Support Your Writing

Writing your life story doesn’t need to test your ability to recall arcane details of your life. Documentary evidence like photos, letters, and diaries can support writing and help you remember memories that will inspire your writing.

What if you have boxes of photos and letters? Or, what if you don’t think you have any materials? Where do you begin? Here are the steps needed for gathering photographs, letters, and diaries to support your writing:

1. Decide the kind of life story you want to write. Identifying your book’s direction will help you concentrate your search for relevant materials. For example, if you’re writing a life story focusing exclusively on your childhood, you’ll want to gather photos, letters, and diaries from that time.  
2. Identify potential sources of material. If you don’t have immediate access to primary sources, consider checking in with family and friends. Also, local historical societies, museums, and libraries may have materials useful for your project.
3. Ask your family and friends for help. Let them know that you’re writing a life story and are looking for any photos, letters, or diaries they may have. Ask them to share their memories of you from different points in your life.
4. Organize your materials. Once you’ve gathered all of your materials, organize them by item type (photo, letter, etc.) or by moment in time (childhood, adolescence, first job, etc.) Organizing your documents will make it easier to find what you need when you’re writing. 
5. Digitize your materials. Though digitizing is optional, having digital copies of your photos, letters, and diaries can protect fragile documents from damage and make it easier to access them while you’re writing.

Using Journals, Diaries, Letters, and Photos as Primary Sources

Journals, diaries, letters, and photos are excellent primary sources because they offer direct, authentic insight into your past and help you understand your thoughts, feelings, and experiences.

Photos provide visual evidence of the writer’s experiences and have the potential to evoke strong emotions in the reader.

When used together, journals, letters, and photos create a vivid portrait. As source material, they help you remember and understand past experiences, relationships, and can reflect important changes in your life.

Remember, you can always upload photos to your book through your DIYBook account where they’ll become a permanent part of your story.

Writing Techniques

First-person vs. Third-person perspective

Should you write your life story from your perspective—known as “first-person perspective”—or from an outside perspective, called “third-person perspective?” No matter which you choose, stay consistent; you may confuse your reader if you switch from sentences like, “I remember walking on the rocky beach every September,” to “he remembered walking on the rocky beach every September.” 

Which perspective makes the most sense for you? Here are a few pros and cons of each style: 

Benefits of first-person perspective

• Familiarity: The reader will get to know the narrator personally.
• Excitement: First-person perspective can create a sense of immediacy and excitement. 
• Believability: First-person perspective lets readers feel like they are hearing the story from the point of view of someone who experienced it.

Benefits of third-person perspective

• Objectivity: The narrator can step back from the action and offer an impartial perspective.
• All-Knowing: The third-person perspective allows the narrator to be all-knowing and can reveal information that other characters may not learn until later in the story.
• Which perspective should you choose?

The best perspective for your story will depend on your goals. First-person may be a good choice to create a sense of intimacy and immediacy. Third-person perspective may be better if you want to be more objective or create some distance between yourself and the material.

Try this easy writing exercise to help you decide which perspective to use

• Think of a scene you want to write.
• Write it from a first-person perspective, then write the same scene from a third-person perspective.
• Read both scenes out loud. You’ll get a sense of which one feels more natural and appropriate for your story and the tone you’re trying to achieve. 

Need a professional take? Book a block of time with a professional ghostwriter in your DIYBook Author Account, where you’ll get expert advice on what perspective makes the most sense for you.

Dialogue, pacing, and tone

Dialogue, pacing, and tone are all essential elements of life story writing. They help you to engage your readers, bring your story to life, and convey your message clearly and effectively.

Let’s define what these narrative elements are:  

• Dialogue: Conversation between characters. Dialogue shows who the characters are, what they want, and what they’re going through. Dialogue should sound realistic and believable to reveal characters’ personalities and motivations.
• Pacing: How fast or slow the story moves. A good story mixes fast and slow parts to keep the reader engaged.
• Tone: The overall mood or feeling of the story, and this can be serious, funny, sad, a mix of both, or something else entirely.

Here’s how you can use these elements in your life story 

• Dialogue: If you are writing about a shy person, you might give him hesitant and awkward dialogue. If you are writing about a confident person, give them direct and assertive dialogue.
• Pacing: A well-paced story will have a mix of fast-paced and slow-paced sections. The fast-paced sections will keep the reader eager to find out what happens next—this is where you might have a lot of action or dialogue. Slow-paced sections will give the reader time to absorb the information and connect with the characters on a deeper level. In slower-paced sections, consider describing situations or people in greater detail and provide breaks in the action. 
• Tone: If you are writing about a challenging experience, you might choose a serious tone. If you are writing a memoir about a humorous experience, choose a lighthearted or playful tone.

Why are these elements important in life story writing?

Dialogue, pacing, and tone are all important elements of life story writing because they can help you tell your story in an exciting and engaging way.

Writing exercises to get you started   

Need help deciding what tone you want or how to switch from fast pacing to slow pacing? Try these easy writing exercises to determine what kind of pacing, tone, and perspective you want to use in your writing:

Pacing

1. Set a timer for 3 minutes and write a short scene from your life story before the timer goes off. Don’t worry about grammar or spelling. Focus on getting the story out of your brain and onto the page.
2. Write the same scene again but imagine you’re writing it for someone who can’t see. Take your time and focus on developing the details. What do the people in your story look like? What are they wearing? What is the setting like? What do you look like? How old are you? Where are you? If you want to make sure you really nailed the assignment, ask someone to read the scene to you while you have your eyes closed—can you picture the scene in your mind? If you can, you’ve done this exercise right. 
3. Compare and contrast the two scenes. Which one do you like better? Which one do you think is more effective? You may find that the detailed version is too slow for the scene you’ve described, or, when you wrote without stopping, you realized that you left out too much detail. 

Tone

• Choose a scene from your life that you want to write about. 
• Write the same scene in three different tones: serious, funny, and sad.
• Compare and contrast the three scenes. Which tone do you think best suits the story? Why?

Perspective

• Choose a scene from your life story that you want to write about. 

• Write the scene from two different perspectives: 
  • the perspective of another person in the scene;
  • your perspective.

• Compare and contrast the two scenes. Which perspective best suits the story? Why?

Bonus exercise

• Write a short scene from your life story using all three elements: pacing, tone, and perspective. Experiment with different combinations until you find a natural and comfortable style.
• Need a professional take? Book a block of time with a professional ghostwriter in your DIYBook Author Account, where you’ll get expert advice on dialogue, pacing, and tone.

Editing and Revising

What is editing?

Nearly all professionally written work goes through an editing process.

Editing improves writing by correcting facts, restructuring content, and checking for grammar and spelling.

Editing ensures you are saying what you mean to say so your reader understands you.

Tips for Editing Your Writing

Editing a manuscript includes a few steps, which we’ll explore here.

Content Editing

This type of editing focuses on your story’s content, style, and overall structure. At this stage, an editor will read your work closely but generally keep your manuscript the same.

Copyediting

Copyediting is when a document is carefully scanned for spelling, grammar, and syntax.

But wait, isn’t that why I have spellcheck? Yes and no. The spellcheck feature commonly found in writing software is a huge help, but it can only catch some things.

For example, the words threw and through have entirely different meanings, but spellcheck won’t flag either word as incorrect. 

Conversely, relying entirely on spellcheck may mean you’ll “correct” words that were right to begin with like proper nouns (names of people, cities, companies, airlines, etc.).

Can I do this type of editing on my own?

Yes! You can certainly do this type of editing on your own. Many authors edit their work in addition to having someone else conduct substantive edits and copyediting. Others have professionals do editing. If you would like professional help with editing, book a block of time with a professional ghostwriter in your DIYBook Author Account.

Below are a few best practices you can use to edit your work.

1. Take a break from your project. Yes, you read that right. Step away from your writing project after you’ve finished writing and before you start editing. Why? You want to approach the material as if you have never read it. If you’ve been glued to your writing for weeks or months cranking out your life story, you’ve probably read and reread the material so many times you think you’ve memorized it. Stepping away helps you reset your eyes. You’ll be surprised at the edits you’ll catch.

• Pretend that you’re reading your work for the first time. Approach your writing like one of your readers: assume you know little to nothing about the topic. This will help you look for storytelling gaps and ensure each sentence supports your thoughts.

• Do your ideas make sense? If you’re having difficulty following an idea, your readers will too.

• Are you repeating yourself? Sometimes, the same story pops up in different parts of a life story—that’s normal but avoid repeating yourself.

• Is your story interesting? Are you skimming part of your story and hanging on every word in another? If so, see why one section is so much more interesting than another, and see if you can replicate that feeling in the less exciting section.

Copyediting usually happens after content editing. And yes, you can copyedit your writing. Here’s what you can do:

• Make sure your style is consistent. Refer to Dialogue, Pacing, and Tone in this guide to review what this means.

• Check for commonly misspelled or misused words. A few examples include:  Its / It’s / Its’; Affect /  Effect; They’re / Their / There

• Consult a dictionary if you need clarification on correctly using a word.

• Check your syntax. Syntax is a fancy word that refers to how words and phrases appear in sentences. Placing certain words in certain places can entirely change the meaning of your sentence.

Look at the following three sentences and see how the meaning changes just by moving one word, in this case, the preposition only:

• Only you can prevent forest fires.

Meaning: you are the only person who can prevent fires. No one else can do it.

• You can only prevent forest fires.

Meaning: All you know how to do is prevent forest fires. You don’t know how to do anything else.

• You can prevent only forest fires.

Meaning: The single thing you can prevent is forest fires. You don’t prevent anything else, such as chemical fires.

• Perfect your punctuation Placing a period or comma can drastically change the meaning of your sentence. Take a look at the example below:

• Let’s eat, grandma!

Meaning: Come on, grandma, it’s time for dinner!

• Let’s eat grandma! (no comma.)

Meaning: Grandma sure does look tasty.

That little comma between eat and grandma makes all the difference.

• Get your facts straight. Was your uncle born in 1952 or 1932? Did your great-grandparents come through Ellis Island or Castle Garden? It’s your life story; make sure these details are correct.

• Take another break, then reread everything. Yep. After copyediting your manuscript, give your eyes and brain a break and reread it, preferably a few hours later. You will find editing easier and less stressful after a short break.

• Remove unnecessary words. Removing words that weaken your work is an effective and easy way to tidy up your writing. Here are a few that you can delete from a sentence without causing harm to the overall structure:
  • very
  • quite
  • in fact
  • just
  • pretty
  • actually

When to Seek Professional Editing

I’m overwhelmed! I can’t possibly write my life story on my own!

If that sounds like you, we’ve got you covered. DIYBook offers one-on-one editing and coaching services that you can book in your Author Account. Editors at this stage will usually write comments about how they think a piece of writing can be strengthened or improved.

It can be hard seeing someone else’s comments all over your work, but remember: content editing aims to make your work sound as good as possible.

Our team of professionals can handle content editing and copyediting for you. All you need to do is get your thoughts onto the page, and we can take it from there. Find out more in your Author Account.

Legal and Ethical Considerations

This guide does not offer legal advice. If you feel you require legal assistance, please seek counsel from a licensed attorney. What follows are general ideas concerning privacy as it relates to your life story and using a pseudonym.

Addressing Privacy Concerns in Your Life Story

The First Amendment to the United States Constitution protects writers by prohibiting the government from censoring their work or punishing them for their speech. This protects writers to express their ideas freely, even if those ideas are unpopular or controversial.

Considerations when writing about other people

• Defamation: a false statement that harms a person’s reputation. Fact-check your work and avoid making statements you cannot prove.
• Invasion of privacy: disclosure of private, intimate, or embarrassing information about a person without their consent. To avoid invasion of privacy, consider obtaining permission from the people you are writing about before sharing sensitive information.

A few tips to keep in mind while you’re writing about other people: 

• Be truthful: Avoid making false or misleading statements.
• Be respectful: Be mindful of the privacy of others and avoid sharing information that could be embarrassing or harmful.
• Use discretion: When writing about your life experiences, be mindful of the privacy of others involved in those experiences. Consider using pseudonyms or changing identifying details.
• Fact-check your work: Make sure all of the information in your story is accurate and up-to-date. Avoid including false or misleading information, even if it is not intended to be harmful.

If you are unsure whether it is okay to include information in your writing, err on the side of caution and leave it out. If possible, talk to the people involved in your story to get their input.

Also, you can’t defame the dead because dead people don’t have reputations to defend.

Using Pseudonyms for Anonymity

Some writers use assumed names when they write their books. These are known as pseudonyms. Many published authors are known by their assumed names:

• Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens)
• Lemony Snickett (Daniel Handler)
• J.D. Robb (Nora Roberts)
• Toni Morrison (Chloe Ardelia Wofford)

Why writers choose to publish under pseudonyms

• Popularity: Pseudonyms create a sense of mystery or intrigue around an author, which can help to generate interest in their work.
  Safety: Pseudonyms can also protect an author’s safety, especially when writing about controversial or sensitive topics. 
• Anonymity: Some authors want to maintain their anonymity. This could be for various reasons, such as to protect their privacy, avoid being stereotyped, or separate their personal life from their professional life. 

Remember that if you choose to anonymize your real name on the cover of your book, then you will want to anonymize the names of friends and family who appear in your book. Otherwise, you will defeat the purpose of using a pseudonym while writing your life story.

The Publishing Route

Once you’ve written your book, you may decide to publish it. There are two ways to get a book published—the traditional route and the self-publishing one.

Here’s the lowdown: 

Traditional vs. Self-Publishing

To secure a traditional publisher (think Random House, Simon & Schuster, or Doubleday), you must first find an agent who believes in your story. To do this, you do not just send an agent your manuscript—that’s a surefire way for your work to be deleted ASAP. Instead, you write a query letter and a book proposal to that agent explaining your book. Then, if the agent likes your idea, he or she will sign you up and pitch your book to various publishers. This is all conditional—there are no guarantees that an agent will pick up a book or that the agent will successfully place it with a publishing house. 

Why you can’t send your manuscript to (most) publishers without an agent

None of the major publishers will look at a book proposal unless an agent presents it—that’s how the industry works. Most traditional publishing houses say on their website, “no unsolicited manuscripts accepted,” meaning, if you email an editor your idea, they will not read it. 

Let’s say you’re lucky enough to snag an agent. Pitching the book to publishers can take a year, if not longer. If it doesn’t work out, you’re right where you started—with no book deal and no publisher. 

Pursuing a traditional publisher is challenging, and getting a deal is not guaranteed. But if you decide to pursue this path, DIYBook’s professional ghostwriters can help you prepare a query letter and book proposal.

The second option is to do it yourself. Many authors have success through what’s often called concierge, indie, or self-publishing. The advantages of self-publishing are that you don’t need an agent and retain control of the publishing process, including any royalties you may earn on book sales. 

It used to be that self-published books were snubbed. And deservedly so. Many early self-published books were poorly edited and ugly. That’s changed. As more authors turn away from traditional publishing houses, the quality of self-published books has risen dramatically. And DIYBook’s ghostwriters and graphic designers can take your book from good to great.

Another major difference is in payment. Traditional publishers will often give you an advance and then pay you royalties (a portion of the book sales), which you also share with your agent. So, if a book sells for $10, you may make a 10 % royalty or $1 on a $10 book. With self-publishing, you pay to produce the book upfront, so when the book sells, you keep any profit you make. Also, the days of ordering 5,000 copies of a book and storing them in your basement are over—print-on-demand has made the process more streamlined and manageable. 

You are as much a “real” author whether you publish it yourself or land a book deal with a publisher. In both cases, the goal is to get your book in front of the right people who will both promote your book and get others to buy your book. If you self-publish your book, don’t forget about marketing and publicity! Your job as a published author does not end once the book goes to market. In fact, some might say your job is just starting because now you’ve got to get the word out to interested readers that your book exists and that they should buy it.

How DIYBook Can Help

DIYBook’s professional ghostwriters and graphic design artists can help you with many of the steps involved in pursuing a traditional publisher or self-publishing. But if you’re looking for help from beginning to end, then our sister company, In Ink Ghostwriting, is fully set up to help you decide whether traditional or self-publishing is right for you and can guide you through every step of the process. 

Marketing and Distribution

How to Create Buzz Before Publication

You are your best publicist! If you decide to publish your life story, you’ve got to think about how you will promote it. The book market is competitive, and you need to make sure your book stands out from the rest. 

Why authors need to focus on marketing and promotion for their books

• To reach a larger audience: Marketing and promotion can help authors reach people who might not otherwise discover their books. Connecting with potential readers is especially important for new authors trying to build a following.
• To increase sales: More marketing can lead to more sales.
• To build a career: A successful book marketing campaign can lead to book tours, speaking engagements, and even film adaptations.

How to create buzz around a book launch

• Create a robust online presence: Share information about your book and connect with potential readers.
• Reach out to book bloggers and reviewers: Contact them and let them know about your book.
• Run a contest or giveaway: Offer readers a chance to win a copy of your book or other prizes related to your book or genre.
• Partner with other authors: Team up with authors in your genre to cross-promote each other’s books by writing guest blog posts or running joint social media campaigns.
• Throw a book launch party: Celebrate the publication of your book and connect with your readers in person by inviting friends, family, readers, and members of the media.
• Reach out to the media: Contact local and national media outlets and let them know about your book launch. 
• Partner with bookstores and libraries: Work with bookstores and libraries to host events like book signings, author talks, and book clubs related to your book launch. 

There’s plenty you can do to generate interest around your book, but you do need a plan. Our friends at In Ink Ghostwriting can help you create a book promotion plan and connect you with publicity professionals to help you do it right. 

Even if you just print copies of your book to share with family and friends, you can still mark the occasion by hosting a book launch and signing party. 

FAQs

Is it a good idea to write about your life?

Yes! Write about your life to preserve your stories for family, friends, and generations of people you may never know.

How much does it cost to write a book?

It will only cost $89 for you to write your life story with DIYBook. Printing costs per book will vary depending on whether you choose hardcover or paperback and if you select color or black-and-white printing.

Is it hard to publish a book?

It’s easier than you might think. Once you’ve written and printed your book with DIYBook, our friends at In Ink Ghostwriting can guide you through the process of publishing and can set you up with a plan that will ensure your book is shared with the world.

You’re ready. Start writing and start preserving your family memories now!

Turn your memories into a book with the help of DIYBook.

Your story is waiting to be told.

Sign up for a membership today and put your story onto the printed page!

DIYBook is an affordable and easy-to-use writing platform that helps people of all skill levels turn their stories into actual books. With DIYBook, you can:

• Write your book in a distraction-free environment.
• Format your book with professional templates.
• Design your book cover with a variety of tools.
• Order high-quality printed copies of your book.

With DIYBook’s membership program, you get access to all of these features and more at a fraction of the cost of traditional printing tools.

So what are you waiting for? Sign up for a DIYBook membership today! You have a story to tell. DIYBook can help you write it! 

About the Author

Barbara Basbanes Richter founded DIYBook, an affordable and easy-to-use book writing program. She also founded In Ink Ghostwriting, a full-service ghostwriting firm helping politicians, pundits, scientists, CEOs, professional athletes, and others get their stories into print.

Under her own byline, Barbara’s writing has appeared in The Wall Street Journal, The New York Daily News, The Vineyard Gazette, Humanities, The Sewanee Review, Fine Books & Collections, Literary Features Syndicate, High Country News, Ravishly.com, Westchester Magazine, and other outlets.

Barbara is a fluent French speaker, and her translation from French to English of Mademoiselle de Malepeire was called a “clever, inspiring gem.”